Out of Chaos – A letter from a Reader

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Out of Chaos – A letter from a Reader

Forum: Theological Expressions
Date: 2001, Sep 11
From: John Doe 666 John666

Out of Chaos – A letter from a Reader
. . . About six years ago, I was in an Assembly of God church. News of the revival in Pensacola had made its way to Tulsa. We began hearing many sermons about being hungry and thirsty for "more" of God. I felt that perhaps I "needed more of God too" and decided to visit a fellowship that had received the "blessing" and was having revival meetings. I went a few times and observed many strange things. I recall being prayed for by one of the prayer team. The lady put her hands in front of my face but did not touch me. After she started praying she had a terrible look on her face and looked at her hands and began shaking them. It appeared that she was feeling intense heat on her hands that was uncomfortable. She soon left me and someone came by with "canned" revival thoughts. I felt nothing during the time her hands burned, but thought perhaps God was doing something in me that I couldn’t see. I remember seeing people acting drunk and saying how wonderful it was, testimonies of healings of band childhood memories and the like, also manifestations of "tics" on people who stood on the platform such as twitching of a head. During these couple of weeks, I would go to my AG church on Saturday evenings for prayer service. I would feel all a "twitter" inside from having been "touched" at the revival services. One night in particular as I came to the alter to pray, a powerful force came over me and I began to weep uncontrollably. I also began to feel as though I was in childbirth labor without the pains. One or two people came over and acted like they knew what this was or meant, but I sure didn’t. No one said anything to me as we left. I wrote a letter to the pastor and asked him about the revival and this experience. He didn’t seem to have the time to respond and weeks later I got an article from a magazine he sent about the revival. It didn’t say one way or other if this revival was of God. I was quite disappointed in him and confused about the whole thing. I spent the next couple months reading a lot of books that were critical of charismatics in general. I also left that church and holed up in a small Southern Baptist church. The worship was different from the exuberant style I had just left and after about two years I became restless and felt that, this church was dead. I felt perhaps I had been too critical and thrown the baby out with the bathwater. This church did not believe at all in any of the spiritual gifts and taught against them.
Another church in town was becoming popular with the revival so I decided to visit there. It was a lively church and the music was upbeat – composed of rock band type musicians and very loud. The people were genuinely friendly and caring. I got involved with a group of ladies in a weekly Bible study. It was a study of the Song of Solomon by Mike Bickel. It was very spiritualized and intense. The lady that led it was supposedly very gifted in the prophetic and usually shook her head and said "Oh or HO" a lot. She told of vision of Jesus where he looked more like a movie actor from her description. Most of the ladies would get a "word" or see a "picture" in the spirit when they prayed. I was impressed, but also curious. There was one lady who used bad language during the study. I looked around to see how others reacted and they all thought it was all right.
I began to notice that when I would go church, play the new worship songs on the CD or pray and read my Bible, my abdomen would begin to shake. Since I had seen so many people at this church doing that, I thought this must be the "anointing" they talk about. I never saw or heard anything in particular when this happened. As I got more involved in the church, I also went to "Intercessory Prayer" nights. These were quite intense and this was a "new way of praying". Many times when the pastors were present, someone would prophesy over them and they would just be laying on the floor "soaking". People falling and laying on the floor and groaning was a common practice during the worship service. The lady who officiated the prayer time would want you to go "deeper" into intercession. Sometimes the prayer was in English and other times in tongues. I decided to take the class offered for those who wanted to be on the prayer team. They gave us a list of rules such as you couldn’t pray for someone unless there was a "catcher". You were not supposed to ask them what they wanted prayer for. They told me that you were supposed to rely on the Holy Spirit to tell you what their problem was, if not just say "more, Lord, etc." This didn’t sound right to me. They gave us a tape of Pastor Linda’s experience in Toronto that started the revival in this church. It was titled, "How OBF Got Her Groove". IT was entertaining to hear how she was touched in the service and her husband had to carry her around for the three days they were there. She couldn’t stand up or sleep. She thought this was wonderful. Every time someone would say something revival-like to her she would fall to the floor and laugh and shake. She encouraged people to seek the Lord for visions, dreams, prophetic gifts, healing gifts. Finally, I heard a warning go off in my head. I read a testimony on the internet from someone about their experience with the revival and how God had brought them out of it, exposing the counterfeit plan of Satan. Somehow, it hit me that what I had experienced was not God at all, but Satan and that I had let my guard down and once again had been deceived by Christians who I thought knew more than me.
Various speakers came to that church. One was Bobby Connors who was a "prophetic" teacher that had the ability to read people’s minds and see into their bodies. Another was Jim Goll. He prophesied over me and supposedly broke a generational curse of anxiety attacks and nightmares -–the truth is I didn’t have any until after I left this church! Frank Sizer was a former Catholic priest who lost his opportunity to have Benny Hinn’s job and now blows the Holy Spirit on people. He also told about paying $10,000 to a ministry to receive healing for his son, which didn’t happen. Cindy Jacobs (one of God’s "generals") came and said that God wanted to visit Tulsa in a supernatural way with signs and wonders and healings. There were several people who had visions of a literal devastating flood that was going to hit Tulsa. Many came and talked about the great endtime harvest and how God is raising them up to be so "anointed" and nothing will be able to stand in their way. Through all of this, I was diligent in reading and studying my Bible and could not find anyplace where these things were going to happen. In fact, the Bible said the opposite.
As I looked back over all the teachings – the truth was that "deceiving spirits" were behind all of this. As soon as I questioned and renounced my belief in all of this the abdominal shaking "anointing" left me. I felt like I was back in my sound mind again. My mother noticed the change in my personality. She said I was arrogant when I believed in this "revival" stuff. You don’t know you are deceived until you have been delivered out of it. Part of me wanted to believe that it was true that people would automatically be healed when I prayed for them, that demons would obey and people would be delivered. The attraction was the power and authority that came with it. You can change the world and bring in the kingdom! Without the King, even! No reason to wait for Him – He has given it all to us here and now. Same old lie. Jesus told the twelve that they should rejoice because their names were written in heaven.
The Lord has taught me many things. Tulsa is the capital of the "Word of Faith" movement. When I was at Oral Roberts University, Kenneth Hagin’s ministry was getting started. His teachings were considered fanatical and not allowed in our chapel services. ORU has changed since then as the Board of Directors are all Word of Faith teachers. Richard Roberts invited Rodney Howard Browne and said it was the best service ORU ever had. When I attended ORU, I worked for the Art Director who used to put together Oral’s advertising campaigns. He admitted how you always had to have new things for people to give money to. I was there when the City of Faith was being built and the money that went into the school was suddenly funneled into the hospital. Most of the students were opposed to it – but it was Oral’s. I also did freelance artwork for a former ORU administrator. He had me paste up letters that he sent to people and sold them a necklace with a star on it – supposedly, if they bought it, they would prosper. There is so much more.
We have huge charismatic churches here. Most I have attended for short periods – or at least visited. They are well attended because they teach what the people want to hear. They focus on being prosperous – they buy expensive cars for each Hagin birthday. In Willie George’s church, you get health on Sunday and wealth on Wednesday. No Sunday school. Carlton Pearson’s predominantly black church is located in the richer white area, etc. All of these churches, some with commendable outreaches into the community, are preaching a selfish and worldly gospel. Their focus is on this life and all of our physical needs to be catered to.
In reading Detrich Bonhoeffer’s book one gets such a different perspective of the Christian disciple. He talks about the sermon on the mount, the Beatitudes, the fact that the disciples were poor, but blessed, treated unfairly, yet did not demand their rights. Identified with the outcasts and downtrodden and were persecuted for their beliefs. They gave up everything – their vocations, livelihoods, security and even families.
I appreciate your interest and so much appreciate the Lord leading me to your website. It helped to know that there was someone else out there who had also struggled through this yet came out of it. God also sent a new friend into my life last year who had been delivered out of the New Age movement in California. We compared notes and found many similarities between the New Age and New Wine. Same deception. I pray for God to use you to bring the truth to others just as I pray for those I left in deception. Only God’s grace can pull somebody out of it and enable them to see the truth. C. Oxford (Tulsa, OK)